Happy Endings
by Paige Brighton
Summary: In the events after Horizon, will a heartbroken Shepard find solace in the arms of another crew member? Set During ME2, with a Paragon Female Shepard.
1. About Horizon

Authors Note—Hello all! This idea came to me a while back, and I just ran with it. I always figured this might be cool. Set during ME2 with a Paragade (but pretty much Paragon) Female Shepard.

Disclaimer—All characters and rights belong to Bioware, along with Kaidan's first correspondence to Shepard.

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><p>Shepard,<p>

I'm sorry for what I said back on Horizon. I spent two years pulling myself back together after you went down with the Normandy. It took me a long time to get over my guilt for surviving and move on. I'd finally let my friends talk me into going out for drinks with a doctor on the Citadel. Nothing serious, but trying to let myself have a life again, you know?

Then I saw you, and everything pulled hard to port. You were standing in front of me, but you were with Cerberus. I guess I really don't know who either of us is anymore. Do you even remember that night before Ilos? That night meant everything to me... maybe it meant as much to you. But a lot has changed in the last two years and I can't just put that aside.

But please be careful. I've watched too many people close to me die - on Eden Prime, on Virmire, on Horizon, on the Normandy. I couldn't bear it if I lost you again. If you're still the woman I remember I know you'll find a way to stop these Collector attacks. But Cerberus is too dangerous to be trusted. Watch yourself.

When things settle down a little... maybe... I don't know. Just take care.

-Kaidan


	2. Happy Endings

Kaidan,

I understand your anger with me, and why you said what you did. I want you to know that I'm not angry with you for seeing that doctor on the Citadel. I would have wanted you to move on, plus, most people don't come back to life, you know?

I'm sorry my return was so stressful. It was for me too. And as for Cerberus.. well… do you remember what I always said? There are some things you do because you have to. Far as Ilos goes, I don't know that I could ever forget. I have been knocked on my ass time in and time out, but I always pcked myself up, every time putting up thicker walls around myself. You're the only one I ever let in, did I tell you that?

Everyone around me dies Kaidan. Perhaps you're better off without me. Shel Silverstein wrote "There are no happy endings, endings are the saddest part, just give me a happy middle, and a very happy start." I got that with you.

Thank you for the good times. May they guide you always.

-Shepard


	3. Ghosts

Shepard,

I was never angry with you. Like I said, everything banked hard to port when I saw you again. It was hell those last two years, thinking you were dead. The things I said to Joker when we crash landed… I've never heard him that quiet. As for the date on the Citadel, she didn't mean anything. I was just trying to stop seeing your ghost everywhere I look. Whenever I was laying in my bunk between planets, I saw you next to me, and whenever I was fighting, I could still hear you calling out orders.

For two years my dreams were ahunted with your last breath. I woke up screaming your name. Not Shepard. Your first name. I was screaming for the woman I loved, not my commander. I rarely ever said this, but I love you. Always. I just can't work with Cerberus now. Or ever. I'm so sorry Shepard.

- Kaidan


	4. How Dare You?

Hey guys! Little note, I decided to include Joker in this (and other characters may come soon, maybe even some non-letter chapters). Whether this eventually turns into ShepardxJoker remains to be seen. Leave a review if you have an opinion. Thanks!

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><p>Kaidan,<p>

How dare you? You don't get to come back. Not after Horizon. You weren't the one who listened to her talk for hours about where you were or if you still loved her. You weren't the one who hobbled down to her cabin and talked to her until she opened up. You hurt her so much that she cried, di she tell you that? Do you know how much it takes to make a woman like her break down in tears? Now, you just come back, tell her you love her, and yet you leave just because she's with Cerberus. You come, break her heart again, and leave. Go to hell. Shepard may be too heartbroken to send you there herself, but you can bet that I will not hesitate.

- Joker


	5. Out on the Citadel

**A/N—Hello all! I decided to branch out with my chapters, and do one formatted like a story. This is a little girls night thing. I thought it might be fun to write a little fluff, but is this just fluff? Might it escalate into something bigger? Stay tuned!**

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><p>Shepard sat staring at the ceiling of her cabin. 'Why is nothing ever easy?' she thought. Her world seemed smaller without him. The blue glow of the fish tanks cast a show across her tear-stained face. Nothing seemed to ever go right. Shepard had never been a woman who pitied herself, but this was in some way different. Maybe it was because Kaidan was the first person she ever let in, and he betrayed her. Like everyone else did. She didn't know how long she had stared at the ceiling when her terminal beeped, signaling a message. Shepard sighed and got up. The message on her terminal read,<p>

_FROM THE DESK OF TALI'ZORAH TO: MIRANDA LAWSON, JACK, SAMARA, COMMANDER SHEPARD_

_Shepard,_

_I heard what Kaidan did. Bosh'tet. Anyway, I told Joker plot a course to the Citadel. Should we have what I believe humans call a 'girls night'? According to Miranda, this is the human tradition after such an event (Jack came up with a different idea, but I'm pretty sure it's illegal in Council space). I'm waiting for the verdict from the other women of this crew, but at least you and I can go out._

_-Tali_

Shepard thought for a while. It _would _be nice to go out with Tali and the gang, forget her problems. Then again, a little alone time never hurt anyone. "Damnit…" she muttered as she tapped out a reply. _'Sounds good. Have Miranda, Jack, or Samara checked in yet?'_ Tali pinged back, explaining that Samara was going to stay back and meditate, but Jack was coming (which is why Miranda wasn't coming). Shepard sighed as she approached her mirror. She was wearing her standard Cerberus uniform, and she looked surprisingly well for having been crying (not that anyone would ever know). Now certain the she looked as pretty as she was going to get, given her current state, she exited her cabin and took the elevator to the CIC. As she passed, Kelly informed her that Tali and Jack would be along shortly, so she should just stay on deck two for the time being. Shepard looked around for a moment, nothing seemed amiss, so she visited Joker and EDI in the cockpit.

"I trust everything is well up here?" Shepard asked as she entered. "Yeah, EDI is going to start figuring out the next step of the mission while you guys are out," Joker explained. "Excellent. Thanks." As Shepard was turning around, Joker quietly said, "I know you were crying, Commander." Shepard stopped dead in her tracks. Had she missed something? "How did you know that?" She questioned. Never looking up from his controls, Joker responded, "Because I know. I noticed it when I was with you in your cabin after Horizon. You get this line in your forehead. It's a little crinkle, like, right—just come here…" he removed his left hand from the controls and placed his pointer finger in the center of her forehead. "There," he finished, returning to his controls. The sound of Jack and Tali laughing behind her made Shepard snap out of the moment. "Real mature, guys," Shepard quipped. "See you later, Joker!" Shepard called as she exited the Normandy.

The trio was barely past the C-Sec checkpoint when Jack blurted out "Who votes that our helmsman has a stupid-ass schoolboy crush on the Commander?" Tali thought for a moment. "He does seem to be interested in you," she finally stated. Shepard just rolled her eyes. "To the bar?" Tali asked, Shepard grateful for the change in topic. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold it there, sugar queen. The nun over here," Jack said, gesturing to Shepard, "Needs to get a different outfit. I will _not _be seen in a bar with someone dressed like a pansy." "We can go to Inata's Wardrobe. It's this place out by the Presidium." Jack and Shepard both shot questioning glances at the Quarian. "You just know that off the top of your head?" Shepard asked. Tali shrugged. "I hid out in a lot of shops while I was hiding here on the Citadel." Jack groaned. "If it will get the nun out of her outfit, fine." The three set off in search of acceptable clothes for Shepard, Jack grumbling "I hate shopping…" the whole way.


	6. A little note

Hello there, readers! I'm at a bit of a crossroads on where to go with this. I want **you **to tell me what you want to see! So, hit me up in my PM inbox on any ideas, or suggestions. Something you want to see more or less of, a ship you want to see or don't. Spam me! I can't wait to hear from you all!

- Paige


	7. Update

**Hello All!**

**I have some news! Updates on this story will be stalled pending a huge overhaul project. I will be leaving the previous version up for now, but I won't be updating while I am working on some new content, and revising some old content. **

**In summary, in a week or two, Happy Endings will be updating again, with a swanky new summary, a sweet new title, and better content than ever. Please stay tuned! Feel free to message me at any time if you want updates on my progress.**

**Keep it real,**

**- Paige**


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